Why those lists teach you nothing.

Ten lines to convince your client. Twenty answers to "it's too expensive". Say this, never say that.

You saved them. You never used them. Why not?

The insight

Think of a lead you spoke to three weeks ago. It went well. You sent something afterwards. Since then, nothing.

What do you tell yourself about that lead? Probably something about him. That he is busy. That he doesn't see the value. That he wasn't serious.

The assumption underneath is a sum: good solution plus logical arguments equals good decision. If the sum doesn't work out, something must be wrong with the other person.

Listen for it for a week. The manager says: my people don't want to change. The salesperson says: the client doesn't see the value. The policymaker says: businesses aren't using the scheme. The parent says: my child never listens.

Four worlds, one pattern. Everyone points at the other person's behaviour and stands outside the problem themselves.

Those lists are the toolbox that belongs to that assumption. They all assume it is your wording. So they hand you better wording.

The design flaw

Design flaw #1 — We like to improve the execution, while the design should have been replaced long ago.

Chapter 6 calls that the fourth match.

You strike one at a campfire. The first that doesn't catch is nothing. Nor is the second. By the third you start looking. And then there is the fourth.

That one is different. Because there you are no longer making fire. You are proving you can make fire. The first three are about the wood. The fourth is about you.

From that moment you stop looking. You push.

What it costs

Every next match makes the one after it less likely, because something changes in how the other person sees you. In the first conversation you are someone who came to help. By the third you are someone who wants something.

And once that has flipped, everything you say is heard differently.

Your best argument becomes a sales pitch. Your good intention becomes a technique.

In the book there is the example that taught me this: I once called a client four times about the same quote. The fourth time he no longer picked up. I thought he was being rude.

Back to those lists

Now you can see what is wrong with them, and it isn't that the lines are bad.

They are all a match. Twenty answers to "too expensive" are twenty ways of adding one more argument. And they only tell you what to say: not when, not to whom, and not what to do with the answer you get back.

A business owner who doesn't see the stake gets irritated by more arguments. Someone who doesn't trust you isn't convinced by another presentation. A client without urgency doesn't buy because you sent another quote.

The exercise

The closing question

If working harder isn't the answer, what is?

That is session 2: pitching doesn’t work any more.